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11/26/2005

Giant Quarter Denied Right To March In Toledo Parade


(Toledo, OH) Toledo's 18th annual holiday parade, which started at the intersection of Jefferson Avenue and Summit Street, found itself the center of controversy when an inflatable balloon in the shape of a quarter was prevented from marching.

"I just don't understand it - there is no more recognizable symbol of Toledo than a coin," said John Robinson Block of the Toledo Blade. "Besides, we helped underwrite this fucking parade, so we oughtta be able to put any float we want in."

Scooby Doo was the parade's grand marshal, and the event ended with the arrival of Santa Claus.

Block lamented the decision by the parade committee to ban the giant coin.

"Toledo became the epicenter of the attention of the state this year," he said. "Why can't we celebrate our notoriety?"

More than 60 floats and bands marched in the 90-minute parade, which paseed many of Toledo's downtown landmarks. Block said that he would consider alternative floats for next year's Blade entry.

"We are thinking of commissioning the balloon makers to design a fat white guy in an orange jumpsuit," he said. "There should be several people it might represent in 2006."

Comments:
CHA-CHING!!
 
I belive that two quarters would have been disallowed to march as well because of the attraction and congregation of the misunderstood youth in the city who are bored an have nothing to do with their time on a saturday afternoon
 
They should have gotten 50 cent..He would have been able to march in the parade.

:-)
 
That is absolutely the worst photo-shop ever.

But a funny story.
 
Maybe it's a good thing that they didn't have the giant quarter...Bob McCrooksky would go out of his way o steal it while J'Fo and Con Dough Carty would tax it and spend it (i.e. give it to Jimmy Jackson or some other crooked developer).
 
Lisa 2 quarters IS FIDYCENT! I think you missed my point.
 
To the best of my recollection, Tom Noe ever appeared on any U.S. currency

JRB was trying to make light of an otherwise serious story, and they called him on it, for playing a particularly lame version of Toledo politics.

"We are thinking of commissioning the balloon makers to design a fat white guy in an orange jumpsuit," he said. "There should be several people it might represent in 2006."

Several in 2006, but only Bob McCloskey for this parade.

Bob (soon to be in cstody, awaiting trial) McCloskey in an orange jumpsuit with LCCC emblazoned on the back; now, THAT would be funny...
 
Bob McCrooksky's won't be getting any jail time. More than likely Julia "I cut in line at Wixey's Bakery" Bates will offer a plea agreemeent to McCrooksky: all charges will be dropped if you resign from council (kind of like the one that she gave to Ray Kest to get Skippy in the Treasurer's office).
JRB chose to hold off on McCroosky until after the elections because the "A-Team" got their rear ends kicked in this year's elections, and by by getting McCrooksky out of the picture (through his lacky Julia Bates), JRB will then be able to get the "A-Team" to put in a new councilperson of his choosing to put the balance towards the "A-Team" again (maybe we'll see the second coming of Karyn "Parking Ticket/Tax Cheat" McConnell-Hancock).
 
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