Toledo Tales

(Toledo, OH) In a move to consolidate his power, Toledo councilman Bob McCloskey addressed the gathered members in council chambers Wednesday.

"We are here to discuss one thing - teamwork," he said. "Baseball! A man...A man stands alone at the plate. This is the time for what? For individual achievement."

McCloskey slid his hands down the length of a Louisville Slugger that he brought in with him for effect.

"There he stands alone," he said, grimacing at the assembled council members. "But in the field, what? Part of a team. Teamwork."

The councilman took a few practice swings with the bat and returned to his baseball analogy.

"Looks, throws, catches, hustles. Part of one big team," he said. "Bats himself the live-long day; Babe Ruth, Ty Cobb, and so on. But if his team don't field...what is he?"

The nervous members of city council looked on, and McCloskey continued with his speech.

"You follow me?" he asked. "I'll tell you - he is no one."

McCloskey walked over to councilman Frank Szollosi.

"Sunny day, the stands are full of fans. What does he have to say?" he queried. "'I'm goin' out there for myself. But...l get nowhere unless the team wins."

With bat in hand, McCloskey glared around the table.

"Team! Team!" he screamed.