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12/16/2005

Toddler Nominated To Fill Council Seat

Left: Would-be councilperson Zachary Higgens

(Toledo, OH) After B Team Democrats nominated a 22-year old woman to take the seat vacated by Bob McCloskey, A Team Democrats nominated a toddler for the same position.

Zachary Higgens, 18 months, will be presented to the full council on Monday for questioning.

"Look - if a 22-year old can do the job, so can a rugrat," said outgoing COuncil President Louis Escobar. "There is no reason why Zach cannot perform as well as some of the other slugs in this place."

Republican councilperson Rob Ludeman embraced the nomination.

"The kid loves to say the word "No," so it's clear he's not another tax-and-spend liberal," said Ludeman. "Also, the way he throws his toys around I think he might intimidate some of the stronger personalities on council."

Higgens refused to speak to reporters from Toledo Tales, opting instead to smear chocolate cake on his mother's kitchen wall.

"He really has a good grasp of policy issues," said his mother, Karen Higgens of East Toledo. "Besides, his "gimme gimme" style makes him a natural fit to take Bob McCloskey's seat."

Comments:
No! No! No!
 
As long as mom is there to change his diapers. Cuz you know what happens when they get too full and the sh*% starts getting all over the place.

Ohhhhhhhhh....nevermind.....that's what happens there anyways!
 
I'm sure that when Zachary doesn't get his way, his temper tantrums will make him a natural fit to fill the void left behind by Karen McConnell-Hancock's departure.
 
Council still has PLENTY of time to corrupt Zachary.

(and he is already smarter than ole Bob...)
 
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