.comment-link {margin-left:.6em;}


Toddler Nominated To Fill Council Seat

Left: Would-be councilperson Zachary Higgens

(Toledo, OH) After B Team Democrats nominated a 22-year old woman to take the seat vacated by Bob McCloskey, A Team Democrats nominated a toddler for the same position.

Zachary Higgens, 18 months, will be presented to the full council on Monday for questioning.

"Look - if a 22-year old can do the job, so can a rugrat," said outgoing COuncil President Louis Escobar. "There is no reason why Zach cannot perform as well as some of the other slugs in this place."

Republican councilperson Rob Ludeman embraced the nomination.

"The kid loves to say the word "No," so it's clear he's not another tax-and-spend liberal," said Ludeman. "Also, the way he throws his toys around I think he might intimidate some of the stronger personalities on council."

Higgens refused to speak to reporters from Toledo Tales, opting instead to smear chocolate cake on his mother's kitchen wall.

"He really has a good grasp of policy issues," said his mother, Karen Higgens of East Toledo. "Besides, his "gimme gimme" style makes him a natural fit to take Bob McCloskey's seat."

No! No! No!
As long as mom is there to change his diapers. Cuz you know what happens when they get too full and the sh*% starts getting all over the place.

Ohhhhhhhhh....nevermind.....that's what happens there anyways!
I'm sure that when Zachary doesn't get his way, his temper tantrums will make him a natural fit to fill the void left behind by Karen McConnell-Hancock's departure.
Council still has PLENTY of time to corrupt Zachary.

(and he is already smarter than ole Bob...)
Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home
Copyright 2007, Toledo Tales ® . Unauthorized duplication prohibited, but feel free to link away. This is a satirical newspaper, and many of these stories are fictional. You have to guess which ones are faked. Toledo Tales ® uses invented names in its stories, except when public figures are being satirized, or when we post a real story. Any other use of real names is accidental and coincidental. Subcomandante Bob once got jiggy with your mom, and she does things in bed that would shock you, dude. The content of this website is the property of Toledo Tales ® and its authors, and may not be reprinted or retransmitted in whole or in part without the expressed written consent of the publisher. Toledo Tales ® is not designed for readers under 18 years of age. FAIR USE NOTICE: This site contains copyrighted material the use of which has not always been specifically authorized by the copyright owner. We are making such material available in our efforts to advance understanding of environmental, political, human rights, economic, democracy, scientific, and social justice issues, sustainable development, environmental, community and worker health, democracy, public disclosure, corporate accountability, and social justice issues, mostly because hot college women are also interested in the same issues. Go figure. Anyways, we believe this constitutes a "fair use" of any such copyrighted material as provided for in section 107 of the US Copyright Law. In accordance with Title 17 U.S.C. Section 107, the material on this site is distributed without fee or payment of any kind to those who have expressed a prior interest in receiving the included information for research and educational purposes, except when you are using it to get laid. If you wish to use copyrighted material from this site for purposes of your own that go beyond 'fair use', you must obtain permission from the copyright owner.

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?