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4/20/2006

God "Surprised" at Court Ruling on Commandments

Left: A ruling He can't figure out

(Toledo, OH) A display of the Ten Commandments at the county courthouse does not promote religion and can remain in place, a federal judge ruled today.

The court decision caught God off guard.

"Get outta here - they actually ruled FOR the Ten Commandments display?" asked The Lord. "The courts never go for that kind of stuff. Is that judge on crack or something?"

US District Judge James Carr said Tuesday that the granite monument, which has stood on the courthouse lawn for almost 50 years, can stay because the motive behind placing the tablets outside the courthouse are secular and do not endorse a specific belief.

"You're just giving me shit, right?" asked Light of Lights. "I mean, Buddha and the rest of those cats never issued a set of stone tablets like Me. That was all My doing - what's this "no specific belief" garbage, anyways?"

God added that he was "kinda hurt" by the idea that the Ten Commandments were not a unique Judeo-Christian concept.

"Here's what I said: "I am God your Lord, who brought you out of Egypt." Pretty clear, right?" He asked. "I was speaking to my chosen people, not every other heathen and Sodomite out there. Tell those quacks in federal court I am pissed - I may have to send a little fire and brimstone their way to show them Who is Who."

Comments:
God?

It's Toledo, Ohio, remember?

Now if this happened in Washington, I would understand the confusion.

But it's Toledo freakin Ohio.

Remember? The city that re-elected a stupid idiot, knowing he'd lie to get re-elected?

Smite him for me, will ya? I'll owe ya.
 
Unless it part of some sick, evil and twisted plot...
 
I'm not sure GOD would have said that, and I'm really certain He wouldn't have said it THAT WAY!
 
HEY!! HEY!!! WE HAVE A BLASPHEMER AND DOUBTER, GOD!!!

Mark him for coal this Christmas season, thank you.
 
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