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Area Heroin User "Not Impressed" with Fetanyl-Smack Blend

(Toledo, OH) Longtime opiate connoisseur Jerry Percival, contacted by Toledo Tales for his opinions on deadly heroin appearing in the Midwest, gave the fetanyl-based mix a less-than-glowing review.

"It's pale, papery white with fine persistent perlage, and has a rich, elegant bouquet with bright floral accents and hints of honeydew melon mingled with some sweetness," he said. "However, I'd have liked more fruit; to be frank it falls a bit short, and at present the tannins are showing their splintery side. Also, I did not get that great of a buzz."

Percival said his second dose, from the same dealer, showed "definite signs of contamination during the aging process."

"The result was a flat, lifeless smack that lost its pretty, vibrant fruit scents and tasted insipid -- it reminded me of vinegar," he said. "I also noticed a certain dullness in the color, and it degraded into a light yellow finish."

The hype about the bad heroin, said Percival, is largely a function of amateur users who accept an inferior product from disreputable dealers.

"Bad blow exists for the same reason that inappropriate ethnic jokes still make their rounds, because people do not speak up to condemn their use," he said, tightening a belt on his arm in preparation for another hit. "Some people are in such a hurry to get high that they will take the most sulphurous, bitter heroin cut with laundry detergent. As long as there are timid consumers, dealers will continue to proffer low-quality opiates."

You'd think that heroin dealers would have more business sense than to handle the cheap shit. It cheapens their clientele and it cheapens their own reputations.
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