Toledo Tales

Left: Napolitano has to see fists thrown

(Toledo, OH) Local numbers man Vic "Bigguns" Napolitano says that he will not be paying out on bets that Toledo Mayor Carty Finkbeiner would go berserk by Christmas, despite a heated exchange today with police chief Jack Smith.

Smith announced his resignation after the spat.

"Listen - all the reports said that the disputre was 'heated,' and that a subordinate stepped in before things got physical," he said, pounding the table for emphasis. "Carty's gotta throw a punch, poke someone int he chest, or level somebody with a 2'x4' before we pay. It's as simple as that."

Napolitano said that the odds on new bets about a Finbeiner explosion have changed.

"We have dropped from 3:2 all the way to 1:5 in the last three hours," he said, doublechecking his spreadsheets. "The bettors think it's more a question of 'when' rather than 'if' Carty will go apeshit."

Napolitano thought that the moment of Carty blowing his top would have occurred in the last two weeks with the bike path fiasco.

"I was taking even money that Carty was going to kick [WSPD host} Fred LeFebvre's ass," he said. "When he called Fred a liar on camera, and threatened to boycott WSPD advertisers, I thought that was it, but somehow he kept from having an aneurysm. Maybe Amy slipped him a couple Valium or something."

The veteran bookie added that he is now taking bets on a Finbeiner-Smith rematch.

"Right now it's 5:2 that Smith will kick the ever-lovin' bejeezus out of Carty, since he's a cop's cop," said Napolitano. "But there's no telling what that crazy-ass Finkbeiner might do when he goes nutso."