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1/13/2007

Owner Struggling to Rent 40-Person Stretch Limousine

40 passenger limousine(Toledo, OH) Ron Eberhard thought that his investment in a 40-passenger stretch limousine was "a fortune waiting to get picked up."

"I thought to myself: why has nobody ever tried this?" he said. "But I haven't landed a single rental in six months. This is pathetic."

One of the reasons for the difficulty in securing rentals, said Eberhard, is the relatively low costs associated with competing forms of mass transit.

"These cheap fucks can get a bus with a boozy, cigar-chomping old driver for $60 an hour," he complained. "I can't even get this monstrosity on the road for less than $125 an hour, let alone stock it with well liquors and Cheezits and shit."

Gathering dust and bleeding interest every month

Eberhard paid a local body shop to weld his "hyper-limo" frame, investing over $100,000 in the vehicle, which he hoped to market to large wedding parties.

"You can fit the entire wedding in here. Of course the fucking thing needs 30 yards just to start turning, and I can't even keep a driver long enough to get him trained," he said. "I'll be better off putting it up on cinder blocks and living in this heap. Fuck me."

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Comments:
Who the hell needs a car that big? What a dork.
 
Since there is a Federal subsidy on White Paint, he must have gotten a nice check from the coachbuilder.
 
He could be hustling the playgrounds for dance and prom business, hanging out at the taverns for per-capita sharecropper hustling, ghosting at the airport, etc. Most White Car operators are nickle and dime outfits anyway.
 
Discount wedding packages are usually associated with White Limousines. Across the street from any major airport in the country you will find White Car Operators eating the $2.99 revenue Hobo Special at Denny's. When finished, they go hustle the skycaps.
 
I really do feel bad for the guy, though it is clear that somebody didn't do their market research.

What the heck, cut the beast up and make two or three reasonably sized limos, that or make it the toast of the trailer park. A couple of propane bottes,some cinder blocks and a lawn chair....
 
Sorry! This limo looks fake to me!!!
 
It is a Photoshop fake. Look at the trees in the background.
 
If you click on the photo and enlarge it, you will notice that the entire vehicle (and the trees behind it) are just cut-and-pasted together. It's a complete fake! Just some Bozo wanting attention...
 
Well, golly, Gomer - you caught us!

Who'd a thunk that a satire site woulda used a Photo-Shooped limousine?

Golly!
 
Translation:

You are a fucking moron.
 
Carter administration officials owed a favor to the paint lobby thus the Federal Subsidy on White Paint. The subsidy on Red Leatherette came about on a deal with China. This created the great surge of limousine operators in the 1980's and beyond as there were plenty of White Limousines available for purchase. Unfortunately, most operators don't know about these subsidies and miss out on their coachbuilder rebate.
 
Limousine Cab Services & limousine services caters to the Taxi Cab, Executive Sedan Limo Town Cars, Event Transportation, airport transportation and Stretch Limousine service needs of customers in the California Bay Area.
 
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