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How Dare You Ogle What I’m Flaunting

A Toledo Tales Guest Editorial
By Sarah McWren

McWren: Stacked, Stocked, and Shocked by Your Prying Stare

As a paralegal in the great Toledo area, I endure a grueling schedule of meetings, court briefings, and case reviews each and every day.

So even though I pride myself on being physical fit as well a young intellectual, I find it disgusting when men ogle the body I flaunt.

I spent four hard years cramming at the University of Michigan to earn my pre-law degree. You know, the human brain is only so big, so it took a lot of really stiff shoving to get all that knowledge in there. And even though I’ve yet to pass the state bar exam, I put my massive legal expertise on the line everyday when I help attorneys prepare for their touchiest cases, most of which overflow with intensity.

But why do my coworkers, who know how smart I am, shamelessly gaze at me when I wear clothes that hug my ass and tits like spandex? Don’t they know how embarrassing and shallow it is to look at someone’s breasts when they’re talking about their second breast augmentation? And when a girl sighs that ‘she’s so horny she could fuck in the broom closet,’ it’s not an outright offer to Rex Williams from accounting. It’s just an expression—the Kappa Phi girls said that shit all the time back in the day.

In conclusion, fellas, treat a gal like a person, not a piece of meat. And when she wears a low-cut top and grabs your balls in the supply room when no one’s looking, be a gentleman—keep your eyes where they belong.

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Yeah Sarah, whatever you say.

What did you say?
Ain't that the truth!
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