.comment-link {margin-left:.6em;}


Car Sex in 1991 Still Defining Moment for Local Man

(Toledo, OH) A 1991 teenaged tryst between local resident Terry Hillebrand and "this really hot cheerleader" continues to be a source of pride and sexual inspiration for the sales manager.

"Dude - it was like the heavens opened or something, the night I nailed [cheerleader] Kerry Grogan," he recalled over a beer with fellow bar patrons. "We're talking crazy sex here, brother, like straddling-the-gearshift kind of shit. We did things porn stars haven't thought of. It was nuts, man, NUTS!"

The encounter, which took place behind the old FoodTown store at the Deveaux Village shopping center, continues to provide Hillebrand with fond memories.

"Whenever the old Johnson needs to be fired up, all I have to do is travel back to that night," he noted. "All it takes is a quick vision of that tight little ass of Kerry's and I am good to go, mister. It's just too bad about her going off to Florida for school, because she was hotter than a set of jumper cables after a Cinco de Mayo dance."

Hillebrand admits that he has at least one regret about the "epic score."

"If I had boned her in, like, 2002 or something, I might have had one of those digital cameras to record the insanity," he said, downing a proffered shot of Jägermeister. "Except we were screwing like rabbits on crystal meth, and we probably would have knocked the camera off the dash. Still, what I wouldn't give for a film of that nasty night."

Labels: ,

Comments: Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home
Copyright 2007, Toledo Tales ® . Unauthorized duplication prohibited, but feel free to link away. This is a satirical newspaper, and many of these stories are fictional. You have to guess which ones are faked. Toledo Tales ® uses invented names in its stories, except when public figures are being satirized, or when we post a real story. Any other use of real names is accidental and coincidental. Subcomandante Bob once got jiggy with your mom, and she does things in bed that would shock you, dude. The content of this website is the property of Toledo Tales ® and its authors, and may not be reprinted or retransmitted in whole or in part without the expressed written consent of the publisher. Toledo Tales ® is not designed for readers under 18 years of age. FAIR USE NOTICE: This site contains copyrighted material the use of which has not always been specifically authorized by the copyright owner. We are making such material available in our efforts to advance understanding of environmental, political, human rights, economic, democracy, scientific, and social justice issues, sustainable development, environmental, community and worker health, democracy, public disclosure, corporate accountability, and social justice issues, mostly because hot college women are also interested in the same issues. Go figure. Anyways, we believe this constitutes a "fair use" of any such copyrighted material as provided for in section 107 of the US Copyright Law. In accordance with Title 17 U.S.C. Section 107, the material on this site is distributed without fee or payment of any kind to those who have expressed a prior interest in receiving the included information for research and educational purposes, except when you are using it to get laid. If you wish to use copyrighted material from this site for purposes of your own that go beyond 'fair use', you must obtain permission from the copyright owner.

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?