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12/27/2007

Car Sex in 1991 Still Defining Moment for Local Man

(Toledo, OH) A 1991 teenaged tryst between local resident Terry Hillebrand and "this really hot cheerleader" continues to be a source of pride and sexual inspiration for the sales manager.

"Dude - it was like the heavens opened or something, the night I nailed [cheerleader] Kerry Grogan," he recalled over a beer with fellow bar patrons. "We're talking crazy sex here, brother, like straddling-the-gearshift kind of shit. We did things porn stars haven't thought of. It was nuts, man, NUTS!"

The encounter, which took place behind the old FoodTown store at the Deveaux Village shopping center, continues to provide Hillebrand with fond memories.

"Whenever the old Johnson needs to be fired up, all I have to do is travel back to that night," he noted. "All it takes is a quick vision of that tight little ass of Kerry's and I am good to go, mister. It's just too bad about her going off to Florida for school, because she was hotter than a set of jumper cables after a Cinco de Mayo dance."

Hillebrand admits that he has at least one regret about the "epic score."

"If I had boned her in, like, 2002 or something, I might have had one of those digital cameras to record the insanity," he said, downing a proffered shot of Jägermeister. "Except we were screwing like rabbits on crystal meth, and we probably would have knocked the camera off the dash. Still, what I wouldn't give for a film of that nasty night."

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# posted by Subcomandante Bob : 9:18 AM
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