(Toledo, OH) Local crystal meth dealer Frankie Kitchener, saddened by images of addicts left without a fix in the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina, loaded a conversion van full of supplies Saturday.
"Yeah, it's sad and all, being ice-less," he said, chainsmoking two Marlboros. "I really feel for these people, and want to help them out."
Kitchener said that some of the meth-heads have been without their drug of choice for a week.
"I could see on TV that many of them were going through some serious feening," he said, using a colloquialism for withdrawal symptoms. "They need it bad, alright."
Kitchener added that this was not a true mission of mercy, though.
"F**k that shit! I am going down there to make a f**kload of cash, baby," he said. "Sure, I'll give 'em a little taste for free, but after that, everybody pays."
The dealer added that this looks like the opportunity of a lifetime.
"Any dealers with any money got the hell out," he said. "Plus, the narcotics cops ain't paying any attention to their regular shit, having been put on dead body detail. I should make $50 grand and a couple of flat screen TVs for sure."