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9/05/2005

Toledo Dealer To Help New Orleans Addicts


(Toledo, OH) Local crystal meth dealer Frankie Kitchener, saddened by images of addicts left without a fix in the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina, loaded a conversion van full of supplies Saturday.

"Yeah, it's sad and all, being ice-less," he said, chainsmoking two Marlboros. "I really feel for these people, and want to help them out."

Kitchener said that some of the meth-heads have been without their drug of choice for a week.

"I could see on TV that many of them were going through some serious feening," he said, using a colloquialism for withdrawal symptoms. "They need it bad, alright."

Kitchener added that this was not a true mission of mercy, though.

"F**k that shit! I am going down there to make a f**kload of cash, baby," he said. "Sure, I'll give 'em a little taste for free, but after that, everybody pays."

The dealer added that this looks like the opportunity of a lifetime.

"Any dealers with any money got the hell out," he said. "Plus, the narcotics cops ain't paying any attention to their regular shit, having been put on dead body detail. I should make $50 grand and a couple of flat screen TVs for sure."

# posted by Subcomandante Bob : 10:11 PM
Comments:
That's wrong, man.
# posted by Anonymous Anonymous : 10:45 AM
 
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