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6/24/2007

Local Man "Ready for Wilderness" After Watching Survival Show

Man watching too much television Left: Breckenspleth gathering vital survival information

(Perrysburg, OH) Perrysburg resident Carl Breckenspleth, longtime television afficiando, said that his efforts watching episodes of the Discovery Channel program Man Vs. Wild have been "time well spent."

"I could be marooned on a desert island, lost in the Rockies, or stranded in a Costa Rican rain forest, and I would know exactly what to do," the confirmed couch potato enthused. "This is some really useful information."

The program documents the exploits of survival expert Bear Grylls as he faces harsh conditions with limited resources while finding his way back to civilization. Breckenspleth said that he has "kind of bonded" with the resourceful Grylls.

"There was a time when he was catching fish on that Pacific island when he looked at the camera, and I swear he was talking just to me," he said, grabbing a handful of Bugles from the bag. "And when he was stuck on Mount Kilauea, it reminded me an awful lot of the time my rear tire went out on I-475. Scary stuff, and I could have died out there."

Bear Grylls in the jungleLeft: Bear Grylls, adventurer and TV pal of Breckenspleth

The Perrysburg native said that he hopes to spend more time outdoors, given the fact that he has made "quantum leaps" in his knowledge of nature through episodes of Man Vs. Wild and other survival programs.

"Let's face facts - people get killed out there," he said, chasing his snack with a Bud Light. "Bear Grylls said that a two-pound coconut falling 30 feet from a palm tree gets over a ton of momentum by the time it hits the ground. The old lady is after me to clean the gutters and all that, but you can bet your ass I am going to wait until my skill set has progressed before I get into some crazy outdoor shit like old Bear does. Hoo-ee!"

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# posted by Subcomandante Bob : 6:26 PM
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